Day Two

Its hi-tech Tuesday here at the Alemtuzamub festival...North-by-Northwest asked why the Alemtuzamub pouches that drip chemicals into our arms were wrapped in kitchen roll. Well, they

react badly to direct sunlight of course was the answer. So this being such a hi-tech trial had they ordered in special reflective covers made at NASA for the Shuttle space programe? No, Asda twin roll absorbant kitchen roll (2for1) will suffice. Talking of drips, toilet time has become a waltz with the drip stands that hold the Asda wrapped chemicals as we make our way cross-corridor to the little room. They, the stands, have the same casters as Asda trolleys, rolling in every direction except the required one. And what's more there are only three wheelie stands for four patients so we have to time our bladders with each other. Don't let anyone tell you the NHS wastes money.

I shall get a little Zen on you now to finish day two...What's the sound of one man peeing with one arm attached by tubes to a stand that only has room to fit behind him? Bollocks, shit, ouch,
pissing hell, pissing floor